Friday, October 31, 2008

Happy Halloween Grand Da Da

Tonight was the best Halloween I ever had.

I gave my Grand Daughter her first Halloween candy.

I took her Trick or Treating to her first three houses on Halloween.

She called me Grand Da Da for the first time. Close enough to Grandpa for me.

I was treated to pizza by my Daughter-in-Law and Son Micheal after Trick or Treating.

This is the best of all lifetimes!

Thursday, October 23, 2008

the laughing warrior

"No mother, I don't want to fight."

"You shame me. How did I give birth to such a coward?"

"The whole village should run away we can't defeat them."

Mother slaps me hard and I begin to laugh that insane laugh I laugh when I'm scared.

She slaps me again and I stop laughing, numb with the knowledge I'm going to die soon.

I walked outside my stone and straw home. I picked up my weapon, a long wooden pole sharpen on one end. I began to laugh again. I laughed a mindless fearful laugh. As I marched towards the Roman Army I laughed. As they killed me I laughed.

I moved towards the light of the heart of the Earth Mother and laughed with joy. I would know the light by many names in many deaths but this was the the only time I came to the light as a laughing warrior.

Past life or just another dream?

like a stone

Death is starting to lose any meaning to me. No I'm not thinking of suicide but of past lives.

I skip like a stone on an eternal pond.

Peace is with me now and no one can hurt me anymore. No one can hurt my ownership of nothing.

My soul is the only thing I ever owned or ever will.

Life is like a stone thrown by the eternal one.

The stone flies through the air as my soul flows through the void.

The stone impacts with water and skips. My soul impacts with life and skips.

I skip in and out of life like the stone skips on and off of water.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

a note to a friend

a note to a friend,

We're all overwhelmed. We are infinite souls given finite centers of our universe called life.

We have lived more lives than we could count and know every hell reality can serve.

To save all living things from eternities of insanity we are given the twin gifts of forgetfulness and imagination.

We seek infinite knowledge but the finite can't be infinite.

Imagination is the only road to enlightenment.

Robert Andrew Vollrath 10-21-2008

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Little Bee Girl

She came to me without hesitation. I became emotional and tears swelled in my normally dry eyes.

Amanda was planing to open a used clothing store for small children. I had bought my Daughter-in -law a box of clothes at a yard sale for her store. In that box was a bee outfit.

Cordelia ran across the room in that silly costume. I love that little bee girl.


I decided to do something romantic. I left roses on Patty's front porch. I didn't leave a note for her father or brothers to read. I just left roses for her to find.

Friday, October 10, 2008

The Red Army

The Red Army marched towards me but I stood before them without fear. The red ants marched across the road single file. Their colony had been poisoned by our neighbour when his grand daughter had been bitten by the ants when she played to close to the large ant mound.

I was five years old when the Red Army invaded my family's back yard. On the north side of an old storm shelter was the ant mound of the black ants. The red ants home was poisoned but they didn't lay down and die, they picked up their colony and went on a quest for a new home. They had no time to dig a new home in the spring rains so they would take the black ants home. As a five year old you had to respect that.

My little gang of friends were all preschoolers except of course our wise leader Brad. He was a first grader and knew almost everything. Our toys became boring as we watched the war between the black and the red ants. The black ants were only a third the size of the red ants but they were in greater numbers. For three days we watched the war play out as we could all see the black ants were going to lose.

We debated among ourselves if we should help the black ants then Brad spoke up.

"It's best to stay out of these things. We should let nature take its course."

The wisdom of a first grader could not be questioned and we watched the war till its bitter end.

I remember the last moments of the war when the black queen was pulled out of what was the black ant mound and tore to pieces. The red queen moved in and the war was over. As the red ants moved in to their new home my father saw all the red ants in the back yard and told my little gang of friends to go home.

I watched from my bedroom window as he poured poison into the ant mound. This time all the red ants died.

Death of a Stream

Behind Arrowhead Stadium in Kansas City Missouri is a little woods. I think it's still there. I once lived near the stadium and spent many hours walking that little woods with my sons.

In that little woods somehow spared from the giant parking lots of twin stadiums was a beautiful little stream filled with tiny fish. Our dog Sonny would drink from the little stream on our walks through the woods.

Sundays the boys, the dog and I would always walk in that woods. One Sunday we found ourselves in that woods and Sonny ran to the stream to get a drink. Sonny stopped on small hill before he got to the stream and froze like a statue. The three of us reached the top of the hill and looked down on the stream. All the tiny fish were dead in the stream. A film of gas from the run off of a Monster Truck show in one of the stadiums had killed the stream.

We never walked in that woods again.

Toxic Barrels

I remember the first time I saw the barrels. The barrels were in a lot next to the house I was renting an apartment in Holden Missouri with my newlywed wife Jackie. I remember looking at the barrels through a fence and wondering what was inside the mystery drums.

Then there was the stories in the local newspaper about the barrels being full of toxic waste.
The local paper said the toxic waste in the barrels had been dumped in ponds, lakes and streams.
I never fished in the area around my hometown again.

Years passed and I didn't think about the toxic barrels. Halfway between Holden and Kingsville they built a facility to deal with the toxic barrels. I remember I heard the rumble in the distance one night. My sons were teenagers then and my oldest son Mark had climbed a near by water tower with his friend Jeff.

Mark and Jeff watched the facility burn from a distance. How the fire started is an unknown.
I remember later that night Mark describing the barrels exploding up into the night sky like some kind of giant toxic fireworks.

The Building

I saw it in a dream. I was in an office building. I was sitting at my desk. I was an army officer with ribbons on my chest. There was an explosion and the building fell on me. My neck was broken and my eyes were bulging from the pressure of the concrete slabs baring down on me. My rib cage was broken and with one last exhale of air, I spoke two words.

"Federal Building."

I died.

I woke up in a cold sweat. I knew a Federal Building was going to be bombed but where?
I told a few friends not to go in the Federal Building in Kansas City Missouri.

I began to get restless and planed a trip to Oklahoma City. I never went on that trip because I had no reason to go there. If I had went there would I have known what was about to happen in a vision. What would I have done if I had?

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

The Fire

I was 17 or 18 and was dating Jackie Allen at the time of this story. Jackie would become my wife and I had fallen in love with her in a very short time. Her home life was terrible with an abusive father and a mother that didn't protect her.

Jackie was going on a trip to Colorado with her mother and some friends. I picked her up at the farm house her family was renting. Inside things were bad. Her father and brother were drunk.
I don't blame her brother Jeff for anything as he was a teenager raised to drink booze but her father Benny was another story. Benny had lost his job for going to work drunk and the power had been shut off in the house.

The house was full of lit candles when I arrived that night. Jackie called for her hamster Sam. Whenever her brother and father got drunk one of them would let the little hamster out of his cage and he would go hide till Jackie called his name. He would only come to Jackie.

As she put her super smart hamster back in his cage I grabbed her suitcase sitting in the center of the living room.

The moment my hand touched the handle of the suitcase, I had my first Black Void Vision.

In that black void I saw a single candle surrounded by the walls of the burning living room.

When the vision ended I felt the urge to tell Jackie to get all of her belongings and Sam the hamster because the house was going to burn to the ground that night. I didn't say anything and the house burned to the ground that night. Jeff saved his father pulling him out of the burning house. Benny had second degree burns on his head and back.

Someone called and told me about the fire. I tried to reach Jackie at her friend's house but they had left their phone off to get a good night's sleep before the trip to Colorado. I drove out to that farm house and told Jackie and her mother. I drove out to where the farm house was and watched the burning embers with Jackie.

Jackie fell into my arms crying, thinking of her little hamster Sam. The poor creature was trapped in his cage.

A week later Benny came by my house. I hated that man like no other. He asked where Jackie was and I didn't tell him. I looked at his burned arms and head and I couldn't help but feel pity for him. I gave him my little black and white TV. He thanked me and left.

As he left with the first TV I had owned, I thought that pity was better than hate.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

The Vision

My ex-wife Jackie Goss asked me why I hadn't told this story before. I'm not sure why this story scares me so. The following story is true and my ex-wife is a witness to a moment in our life together when I predicted a future event in stunning detail. This is my 400th post on this blog and if you choice to do so, you are about to read about my strongest vision in a life of visions.

I use to enter any contest that had to do with costumes and the strangest of these contests was the Weird Sunglasses Contest in early summer of 1981. I don't remember the name of the radio station that held the contest but I do remember where it was held.

I won that contest with my sunglasses with 23 lens and frames made out of 3M 3-D material.
First prize was a free weekend at a nice hotel in Kansas City Missouri.

I remember the argument I had with my wife Jackie about going to the hotel on July17th.

"I need to go that weekend! I want to go that weekend! Why can't we go that weekend?"

"My brother Jeff might be in town for his birthday. Why are you yelling at me about this?"

"I don't know........ You're right, we need to be here if your brother comes by. I'm sorry I don't know why I was yelling at you. I'm going on a walk. I'll see you in a few hours.......I love you.
I'm really sorry I yelled at you."

I rushed out the door and got in my car and drove to a wildlife park. In my twenties any walk for me was a ten mile hike in the woods.

In the woods I felt at peace. I thought how selfish I was to be married when I had seizures everyday and couldn't remember my own name on a bad day. Now I had a son and that made me even more selfish. How was I, the brain damaged fool going to raise a son?

A sense of dread came over me and I knew something bad was going to happen.

Two weeks later and we were entering the Hyatt Regency at the Crown Center Complex in Kansas City Missouri. After we checked in for our free weekend we decided to go swimming.
As my wife and I walked across the upper sky-walk in the hotel lobby I thought about my only child Mark. This was the first time we were away from him for a weekend. I hoped he wouldn't miss us too much.

Suddenly I felt the sky-way flex up and down an inch over and over again. I turned to see three other people walking on the sky-walk. Only three people walking and the sky-walk flexed that much? For some reason I felt compelled to put my hand on one of the red support rods.

The moment I touched that rod I found myself in a black void watching the top sky-walk splitting in half and pan caking the lower sky-walk with the result of both sky-walks falling to the lobby floor. I came back to this reality and turned to my wife Jackie.

"This sky-walk is going to fall soon!"

After our swim we didn't walk back across the sky-walk and looked rather silly walking across the floor of the lobby in swim suits and towels.

"Sir, could you please use the sky-walk after your swim?"

Said one of the hotel staff. I stopped walking and looked him straight in the eye.

"That sky-walk is going to fall in two weeks and it scares me to walk across it."

The man gave me a dirty look and walked away.

That afternoon dressed in normal clothes I spoke to the front desk clerk and he dismissed my vision as a vertigo fantasy.

That night Jackie and I went swimming again and I saw why the sky-walk was going to fall.
Hundreds of people were dancing on the sky-walk in a event called a Tea Dance. As the big band played I became sick to my stomach.

Two weeks later I'm driving in my car when I hear the news on the radio. I begin to cry.

I pull the car into a strip mall parking lot. Turn off the engine and lay my head on the steering wheel and cry like a baby in deep sobs.

To this day I feel guilty I didn't tell more people about this vision when it could have saved lives.

Next Post; The Fire

Thanks goes to Jackie Goss, my then wife for helping me write this story.