Saturday, November 8, 2008

The Roses

We no longer spoke with our minds. The magic was gone. There was no half speak in our conversations and long moments of silents filled the time we spent together.

She had grown so much in the short time I knew her but she was still in that moment of death.
I had long ago left that echo of forever behind me and was content to be in the finite of this life.

I was a few months younger than her in the flesh but my spirit was truly ancient and my imagination was boundless in the ways of people.

The Roses I gave her sat on a table and her brother surprised us has he walked through the front door. I stood up and he gave me a cold stare. She introduced her brother to me and he took my hand in a firm grip. As I looked in his threatening eyes with compassion he became nervous and released his grip as he looked away.

He saw the roses on the table and I saw a flash of anger on his face. I meet that quick look at me with the slightest of smiles.

How long had he been spying on his sister and I? With that silent thought I sat back down.
After some confusing talk between a brother and sister he left.

I talked to Patty tonight. I must have sounded like a fool. I've been having backwards days.
I don't know if our relationship has any future and my mind hops from one memory to another when I think about her. She is a miracle of courage and faith.

I think of the roses I gave her and the look of anger when her brother saw the roses. Later she tells me about the meeting her father and brothers had with her about me and other things.
She tells me how protective they were when she was a teenager. Her father was part of Air Force Intelligent. One of her brother's was a policeman. All the boys her age were afraid to date her.

In the meeting about me, a younger brother tells her, he spied on us when we were roasting marshmallows over a small fire pit in her backyard. I laugh as all this makes me fell like a teenager at 50 years old. Her family decides I'm not a bad person as Rosemary (my grand daughter's Great Grandmother) has vouched for me.

No matter how old you get, dating never gets any easier.

I wonder how hard it is for Patty? Being two years in a coma, learning to talk and walk again.
She had to learn how to live alone again. How did she get the courage to date again?


Joan Sandford-Cook said...

Oh Robert, what wonderful language and expression of spiritual knowledge in your last three posts, but why are you writing about death at this time in your life? The artist post worried me a little - cos with that sentiment I should have killed myself years ago!!?? but I plough on not yet wanting to experience eternity without my body and loved ones. I know it will eventually be an adventure, but Im not yet ready. I'm enjoying earthly life too much. It'll come in its own time. But meanwhile your language speaks volumes to us.

Robert A Vollrath said...

I'm not writing about death but the eternal soul. Death is turning the page on the book of eternity.

I no longer fear death or the pain of life. Depression seems like a joke I played on myself.

I feel a joy of spirit beyond all words. I am as happy as I've ever been in my life.

I had to write these posts on past lives and those moments the page was turned. I can't explain why but the urge was too great too ignore.

My next post will be very silly.

rosalie said...

such an honest post..

but i don't get your question at the end, cause i'm sure you know that for listening to and following the voice of one's heart and soul it doesn't need an 'ordinary life' as thousands of humans live.

it only needs strength sometimes- and there remains the question of how to gesome strength. i think we all can only get it by love- love that is given to us.

i still find this 'story' about the spying disgusting somehow. finally, i hope you both will have the courage (!?) to stay on your path :) but also to stay honest.

Robert A Vollrath said...

As Patty will someday read this post I am careful not to write anything that would hurt her.

Patty is the only person I've ever meet that has a deep understanding of the spirit world as I do.

Patty's husband died in the car wreck that put her in a coma.
Her journey back to our world is a miracle beyond any I've heard of.